East Tennessee A&M

         (Forbes Magazine ranks colleges based on which graduates go on to the most lucrative careers. Google News - Fall 2015)

            If East Tennessee A&M & N&I was good enough for Pappy, it'd be good enough for me, we figured. It's a small school, but as they say, there are those who love her. Go 'Leggers!

            But accidents do happen. I swear the fire wasn't entirely my fault. Melanie Sugarman practically forced me to demonstrate my manhood, and we didn’t see the frickin’ Bunsen burner behind her! At least no one was hurt, and damage was limited to the Chemistry Building.

            So my subsequent transfer to North Wurtzburg Polytechnic was not by choice. As it turned out, Poly and I were not meant for each other either. The chain-link fence with razor wire encircling the "campus" was probably a good idea, but overstated, I thought. Plus, how attached can you be to a school whose football mascot is a possum? On work release back home, my buds had a field day with that, you can bet.

            I transferred to East Point, not surprisingly a much better fit. You're thinking West Point, right? Nope. East Point lies right across the river from the Black Knights of the Hudson. You'd be amazed how many of those stressed-out doughboy wannabes would commandeer a skiff and row across – on black nights, for sure – to score a little help from their friends, EP being noted, shall we say, for its "agricultural" curriculum.

            And I poured my heart and soul into that place. My diploma, such as it was, did come eventually – postage due, no less – and just in the nick of time. Feather, my boss at Richfield Pharmaceuticals where I'd scored a job, was tired of taking my word that I'd matriculated. Under the circumstances, how could I blame her? But she cornered me in the hall one day, backed me against a wall, and told me I'd been promoted from packaging to testing.

            Rockin' !  New York will really legalize the stuff one of these days, and then talk to me about what schools produce the most lucrative careers.

            "Rich Field." Get it?